The Too-Easy-to-Fall Girl

The way he got her phone number was easy
as she did not mean to against his will.

He chose to stay with her
when she was piled up with works and tired
when her car was broken down and helpless.

She thanks for the white rose (fulled with thorns).
She thanks for the three (deceiving) words.

It was not the end but he left
without leaving any sign
without saying any word
leaving the fallen girl.

至：那我不曾擁有的你（二）

我一個人走，
走進了無底的黑洞，
走到累了也得假裝、假裝享受；
讓我一個人走，
就算跌進了瘋狂的漩渦也不屑你的援手。

後來，我才發覺，
沒有了你的世界，
猶如沒了柺杖的盲子，
失去了方向，
失去了唯一的依賴；
就算我征服了世界的頂峯，
我依然一無所有。






當你把愛說出來，
我卻說太遲了，
不是因爲我的心給了人，
而是給了你太多，
最後全滅了，
成了一個空心人。

至：那我不曾擁有的你（一）

每首歌的旋律，
出現的都是你的背影。

感覺到你的存在，
但卻很不實在。

你曾幾何時的回頭，讓我有了一絲的希望，
但，你給的卻是那不屑的眼神。
四年了，那一幕仍歷歷在目……
可想那眼神是多麼的空洞、多麼的無情。

我不被他愛，

只有他被愛，

沒有你的存在，

我的魂被風主宰。

— 毀夢 —

沒期望 || 沒失望

把夢畫在風箏上
讓它在風中飛揚
剪斷風箏的線
讓它在空中翱翔
最後 在艷陽下 灰飛煙滅

那回不去的時光

I've missed this place, missed the ones who made this place so wonderful,  but I went back and found everything has changed. The place is so familiar but the people are strange.

帶着興致勃勃的心情舊地重遊，

卻得拾起散落一地的碎片，

把它們聚在一塊兒，

慢慢拼湊回我所熟悉的樣子。

遺憾的是，

甚至有些跌得太細碎了，

實在無法拾起。

其實我們都知道，

就算拼好了，

這也只會是短暫的。

我無能爲力，

只能以心酸做個了斷……

Anyhow, we'll meet again. 

*Be optimistic

賣龍鬚糖的男孩

        不久後就要回宿舍了，看着天氣涼爽，又想到外頭走走，所以就隨爸媽去了趟夜市。一如往常，市集上的擺賣的東西都吸引不了我的目光，我只是漫無目的地牽着媽媽的衣角並肩而行，直到看見了攤子上擺着那色澤乳白、細絲萬縷的龍鬚糖。

         從體格上看來，站在攤子後的，不像是個經過千錘百鍊的師傅，那鴨嘴帽帶得低低的，專心地在製作龍鬚糖。我從沒試吃過龍鬚糖，也沒看過那繁瑣的純手工製作過程，打算買盒來試試。做完龍鬚酥後擡頭把包裹好的龍鬚糖交給買客的竟是一位少年。由於“老闆”堅持現做現賣的原則，我和我媽也只好靜心等待。那“老闆”一邊不疾不徐地製作龍鬚糖，一邊簡潔地介紹製造龍鬚糖的材料和過程。不一會兒功夫，就把一盒龍鬚糖交到了我手上。在那微弱的燈光下，看不見少年的臉龐，卻能感受他那陽光般溫暖的微笑。

          雖然試吃後沒我想象中的好吃，但是勝在那股精心製作的誠意。試問，這時代還有哪個充滿魄力的青年願意靜下心來、耐心地學會那流傳千年的手藝。:)

#muchlove

I hope time can be rewind.

I miss my friends in LUCT so much.

Was thinking of how we met, how they've changed my mind, how if I'm still there...

My ex-house-mate, Emelia and I used to walk and sit by the swimming pool and chitchat. Anything could be the topics. She's a sweet but pessimistic girl.

My ex-room-mate, Yuki told me horror stories and ended up both of us can't fall asleep then had a long heart-to-heart talk.

My ex-neighbourhood, Valerie is such an insane. I can be so crazy with her. We did all the silly things just to prank people and get their attentions. There will be full of laughters when she's around.

My ex-course-mate, Rathnam, an innocent but kind guy. He's so kind to feed the strange cats and donate to the poor ones. He liked to bring me everywhere to dine with him. I feel so sorry for him for being cheated by girls. He's the only guy in the world that I can talk openly and frankly with.

My best friend, Ree. The most memorial place for both of us is the Sushi King, Alamanda where we spent our time during break, shared our stories and sang together in her car.

And a gang of foreign friends. Hakim, my big brother there who appreciates our friendship so much. Mansour, the sweet and adorable guy! He's so ambitious and smart too. "Moo", a cute and shy guy who likes to play basketball with me and guess what he sang birthday song to me with Emelia and Valerie through the phone! Mustafa who likes to sing. Jon Ibrahim, the humour Chinese guy who likes basketball. Saeed! who likes to call me "princess"? haha. I can't believe that he's already doing Master in IT when he first told me. 

We liked to gather around the basketball court or swimming pool to talk, to sing, to learn Arabic and to share everything!

Awww... I really miss you guys. I feel so sorry that I can't make it to go back to Desaria.

Sleepless nights

I hate nights.
Hate sleepless nights.
I close my eyes but can't shut the tear barriers.

I'm not sad.

But sometimes, I just want to hide.

Hide those feelings somewhere deep in my mind.

Even I can't reach there.

Why can't we control our own minds from thinking too much?

Mr. & Elle: Torn - Day 7 onwards

Everything has changed.
They don't feel the same.

The end.

Mr. & Elle: Torn - Day 6

"I don't know what we are. Sometimes I feel like we are friends, sometimes I feel like we are more than friends and sometimes I feel like I've never known you at all..."

Monologue by the girl.

She should...

Quit cheating herself that the best thing that could ever happen to her.

Quit cheating him of the same.

Fall hard, fall long and fall forever...

At some points, she has got to just jump. She has to quit from being scared of the "maybes" and "what-ifs".

Be strong, be tough and be brave.